Some say this is the month of love. I can get behind that – mostly because every single one of us (myself included) needs a little more of this sought-after emotion these days, dammit. To get to that “love” emotion requires so much work and is often infused with all the things we’re lacking in our exhausted moments – things like vulnerability, empathy, compassion, and understanding.
Sometimes we must decide to do these things on purpose, especially when they are buried deep under overwhelm and resentment. One of the places to start, if you’ve got anything in the tank, is simply making some space to not just look at the people you love, but to truly see them (there’s a big difference).
A difference that psychologist John Gottman, (who has done over four decades of research on marriage) explains beautifully. In his book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, he says this:
“You don’t have to be interesting. You have to be interested.”
That’s the special sauce. Being interested in our partners and what they have to say is the same as really seeing them. Love is the hardest, bravest, most “worth-it” emotion on the planet. That’s what makes it sacred. And, if it’s easy, it’s likely not going to last.
Focus on the love this month. Valentine’s Day aside, we need love in every nook, every cranny, every heart where you can find it. Give it, get it, send it, manifest it.
(And pssst. if you need some inspo, there’s always the V-Day goods at the drjodyshop!)